Sunday, April 1, 2018
Tuesday, March 27, 2018
Frustrated but think positive.
Friday, March 23, 2018
Tuesday, March 20, 2018
Sunday, March 18, 2018
Exausted but enjoying this video on Scotland
Monday, March 5, 2018
One of my favourite libraries.
Thursday, March 1, 2018
Metronome for sleep
Tuesday, February 27, 2018
Sunday, February 25, 2018
Monday, February 19, 2018
Great doc i watched
Sunday, February 18, 2018
Thursday, February 1, 2018
Wednesday, January 31, 2018
Tuesday, January 23, 2018
- talk foolishly; babble."Tom havered on"
- BRITISHact in a vacillating or indecisive manner."most people giggle at their havering and indecision"
Wednesday, January 3, 2018
Monday, October 2, 2017
I rode and camped up north last week. It was a heat wave and a few days later freezing wet and windy. Man I'm still wiped from that trip! Lol
Tuesday, September 12, 2017
I had The craziest day yesterday. I went to Chinatown to do groceries and this man was passed out on the road and in front of a bank and the Italian Embassy driveway.
Literally thousands of people walked by this man passed out on the street. I saw a police officer riding by on a bicycle and I stopped and waved him down and all he said was I got to go and then just took off on me. So me and another gentleman decided to get together pick the guy up & take him to the wall of the bank in the shade, better than being on the street. I had to put handfuls of his change back in his pocket.
I quickly grabbed groceries and when I came back five minutes later he was in the exact same spot passed out with again tons and tons of people just looking and walking by and not helping. I went inside the bank and told them to call Someone to help this guy. And they looked at me like I was just being a complete pain in the ass, like that was not their problem. They eventually said they would call 911.
I try to speak to the guy again and I told him to please get off the road and then he drank rubbing alcohol and said that he was fucked. He got up and stumbled off and I regret not calling 911 myself to get this poor guy help. It saddens me it's not easier to get help when people need it.
And considering where he was laying during rush hour I should've called 911 I regret not doing that.
I don't think the bank called at all.
Tuesday, September 5, 2017
i have been on 3 medications in 2 months for my crazy brain. I seem to have bad reactions to all of them so far.
its like ii have been on a mental roller coaster ride.
Today I am joining the impact study, they will study my genetics and how it relates to reactions to medications. Cool!
I did buy a Bicycle to burn off my energy and avoid the TTC. I rode 500 km so far. I slept way way too much this summer. I think my brain is being eraced, but considering all the crazy things I have seen, its probably not a bad thing lol.
I have been thinking about art. i guess thinking about what i have made in the past, what i enjoy making and , why does anyone make art in the first place. i guess its a great way to Express yourself and create something beautiful at the same time. it's too bad it takes a lot of energy to make.
This is my first self-portrait. Lol
Monday, August 21, 2017
The other day on my patio i was listening to my podcast at my picnic table with my headphones on and a raccoon snook up on me and put its mouth right around my leg and softly bit me without breaking the skin. after I felt the bite I looked down and saw this raccoon and I screamed at the top of my lungs then it ran behind the fence, with this cute little face 2 of them looked like they just wanted to play! honistly i think only the craziest things happen to me!
its hard to see but this was the only redness it left.
Wednesday, August 9, 2017
Tuesday, August 1, 2017
Wednesday, July 26, 2017
Reliving the dream
I am going to tell you about an experience I had the other day! first of all I'm going to start by saying I have had a lot of nightmares in the past six months or so. One of The nightmares oddly enough keeps reoccurring and it involves me being in the park system where I grew up, but strangely enough at night and kinda lost.
Anyways I visited my sister for the first time in quite a few months. We had fun and was talking about her upcoming trip to Scotland, we had a few beers, pizza and the largest cheese platter I ever seen! she's a great host!
at some point we where talking about her trip & her going to visit my parents old homes and me wishing i could go and also our crazy family, and she said something
randomly that (just set me off), it essentially related to my place within the family, and somehow with her response I completely snapped! rather than just talking about it or saying well that's stupid or whatever, I literally bolted in my flip-flops right out her front door faster than a dog at a fireworks show, I don't understand my rationale but I ran and I ran and i ran! I could hear them chasing me down the street, saying Blair come back blair come back, and the more they yelled the faster I ran! somehow I just thought I'm going to out run these guys! in my brand new flip-flops on the very first day wearing them I just kept going! somehow I didn't really know where I was going all I knew was running and going home eventually, I managed to pass the high school that I went to, I managed to pass the town house I lived in i've managed to pass the middle school that I went to and I managed to pass the other townhouse complex I grew up in and the school I went to in grade 5. and when I couldn't run any further I just kept walking towards the city. (my current house) and just like my dreams I actually went through the entire park system that I grew up in when I was a kid but at night! just like those reoccurring dreams, I could've taken the bus or any number of sensible things but somehow I just lost it and kept going! at some point I didn't even know where I was going, I was walking down an abandoned 4 Lane roadway with construction and didn't care at all. i just kept going! I thought to myself this may take a couple days to get home but it's OK I'm in a really good mood, I'm just gonna keep on going. At some point I remember thinking why didn't I bring my shoes and glasses! I somehow filled my water bottle from this industrial park lawn sprinkler and turn my phone on airplane mode to save the battery in case of an emergency, I even managed to take a couple photos because I couldn't believe that I was on this incredible adventure.
Somehow about 10 km in, I wasn't sure what direction I needed to go in, I turned my phone on and because I didn't have my glasses I couldn't see google maps. Somehow in my crazy logic I decided I will text my friend a screenshot of the map and he can look at the map and tell me which direction I need to go. I don't know what I was thinking,lol. I think I was hoping he would say oh yeah take that road to the left, see you later man. lol and that's essentially when I guess (he freaked out!), I was pretty much trying to brush off everything because I was still on a mission and wanted to walk home, at this point I was at the airport, (at this closed burger place where we used to bike ride when we were kids to watch the planes) and that's when he somehow convinced me not to go anywhere! within a few minutes I was in some strangers Uber car heading to his place. and then at his place three people convince me to go to the hospital Camh. i'm pretty much a pushover so I went.
I still can't believe all those park system dreams months in advance, I inadvertently relived them in that crazy state. call it psychic déjà vu I don't even know what that was.
All I know is my flip-flops are definitely worn in! and I'm glad things turned out the way they did. and yes i'm getting help!
ever since my accident at work and a few other incidents at that place, im just not the same, but because of those crazy dreams and this experience I can't help but think there must be a higher power and a purpose for it all.